Hi,
It is amazing how quick your state of mind dive into patterns. Only when I got out for a quick vacation from the military reserve for refreshment I realized That I think like a soldier.
Standing in the bus station 
I felt weird and kept looking around. Then I realized that I didn’t feel comfortable because they weren’t wearing uniforms! I got used to be surrounded with soldiers and that I need to be suspicious with people not wearing uniforms – settlers or Arabs.
The workers I saw in my running were Arabs. I kept looking at them, thinking if they look suspicions and I need to ask for ID ( not that I have the authority, but the thought did cross my mind)
Not only this – I think I broke half of the house =/ I kept using too much force and little thought as possible in my actions. What result in broken things….
I hope that I will be released I quickly get out of this state of mind.
Take care
Gad