The pain comes after…
The pain comes after. Not at the moment that the decision has made, not even when you know it going to happen – That Ima called the Vet and he will come tomorrow. Not to kill him, to put him asleep.
Fatma and I took him to see a movie, we held him tight and hug him but he was to sick even to understand what going around him.
I took him down for the last time in my and his life, holding him in his old stinky blanket like when he was a little puppet. I let him stand – he looked at me and didn’t move. He didn’t even sat down – just look at me. I picked him up and let him lie on the sofa.
Fatma was crying, “How can you make it to him?!… You murderer!” she was yelling at Ima. “They are going to kill your dog, and all you can say is – It is for his best?!” she was shouting at me. It was for his best… He even didn’t got up to jump to Aba knees to ask for food – he had never done it before. He used to jump the moment Aba was sitting by the table – nagging him for food and stealing the cat food.
I hug him for the last time, kissed all of the family for goodbye and went home. “It is only a dog, a good dog but only a dog” I explained myself why I not sad.
I was wrong.
Nobody expect the cat is jumping at me when I open the door. The cat is looking at me, asking me where is the his mother – Swift. He was whining when the vet injected swift the poison. The vet was astounded – “I ever never seen something like that!”. Aba buried him in the garden, he send us a SMS saying he buried swift. Aba didn’t cry, at least until Guri called him and talked with him.
“It doesn’t matter how loyal your dog will be – the day will come and he will brake your heart” said Yoni.
I didn’t cried for him.
until now.
Take care
Gad
dog